Well, as any of you know already, pain sucks. But, for a change, it is not my pain. I still seem stable for now as far as that goes. One who is close to me is not so well off at this point. I am in the recently odd position of having to help someone else with fairly basic adult daily living type things, and I am glad I can still do this. And the person I am helping now has a deeper understanding of what I have gone through the last ten years or so. The jury is still out as far as the issues being faced.
As I said, I am stable. What that means is that I am still weak. My shoulder blades still are winged. My right thumb is still basically worthless. But as I may have mentioned, if my right hand was stronger, I would still be unable to lift much with it at this point.
I have to wonder about all of the websites that suggest that NA/PTS only usually impacts the right shoulder. Yes, that would mean that the causal agent can determine right from left, and up from down. Yes, the agent that causes PTS/NA knows that the right side is the right side and the left should be left out of the attack. And while we are at it, it also knows to stay out of the other plexus sites. No need to go there. It is too far away to matter.
Well, in my case at least, the causal agent is just not that smart. Sure the left shoulder is not impacted as obviously as the right, but the weakness is exactly the same right to left. The weakness goes into my lower back and upper legs. There is not anything obvious down there to be winged as the scapulae do, but that does not mean the nerves are not being impacted just the same. Most websites suggest that not only should my damage be restricted to my right shoulder, but also that I should have recovered by now. That does not seem to be happening either.
I have to wonder what my occasional need for super deep breaths might mean. Is my phrenic nerve also compromised already? For the most part I am breathing just fine. But in certain positions I do find I have to take an extra deep breath every so often. I know people who are on oxygen due to PTS. Is that in my future too? Maybe I am good for now. But what about the next attack that is sure to come in the next few years? Just like the killer earthquake that the San Francisco area is bound to have at some point, I am waiting for my next attack.
I try to stay physically strong, but how do you exercise muscle that has no nerves to fire it? In my brief returns of strength, the muscle still works, and seems to be able to get stronger as long as it works. But then, it disappears again and I return to being weak. I have always been thin. I guess it is time to give up on ever looking any different.
Good bye for now. I hope you all are doing better than I am, and maybe you will be able to recover as the websites suggest you will, at least on average. I guess I have never really been average. No reason to change that now.
I will be back at some point.
Be well. . .
